Hijab to me

Image courtesy: hijabhappiness.tumblr.com



I am taken aback by the ghastly comments like the title of this recent blog post on the Tribune Blogs-Satan would urinate in your hair? Why do we scare little girls about sexual predators when they ask us about wearing the hijab? Why is it considered a symbol of oppression? A foreigner is inclined to label it a symbol of oppression if we force little 6 year old girls to wear them and to always conceal, conceal, conceal! Children’s movies like Mulan, Brave and Frozen spread messages of women empowerment and self-determination; imagine what goes on in the mind of that little child growing up? She wants to explore and run freely without the thought of someone ogling at her weighing down her individualism. Unsatisfactory responses towards the concept of hijab left me with ever-morphing beliefs about wrapping my head.

So after some introspection, an Umrah (which was a very big blessing, Alhamdolillah!) and reading this wonderful book called From My Sister’s Lips, I came to believe the beautiful part of this concept. The 13 year old me could not have grasped the serenity that came with embracing the hijab. I no longer wore the hijab as an imposition but as a sacred part of my identity. I used to wait for weddings and parties at school where I would flaunt my hair-dos but even if that desire still lives inside me, I no longer chase that desire. This sacrificial belief comes from a deeper attachment with one’s spirituality (which, in most cases, does not exist in one’s teenage). I do make mistakes, here and there. I’m not perfect. I forget to pin it properly sometimes, I wear a shorter red hijab just because the blue one wasn’t matching with my clothes. I’m still learning, and not preaching. There are so many versions of hijab out there and there is no mention of a specific type of clothing for women in the Ahadith or Quran so I respect everyone’s version of modesty.

Hijab to me is a wonderful way of expressing the spiritual revolution that I went through (it wasn’t abrupt, it was a slow, thoughtful process to challenge the dogmas created inside my mind against all mentions of hijab– I perceived it as a patriarchal idea). Most of my understanding was intuitive and there is no scientific explanation of this concept. It’s just that I do it for myself now. I don’t think guys stare at me lesser because of my hijab, I also haven’t even felt like I look ugly in it.

I feel liberated from the fears of being judged for not wearing a hijab and from the fear of someone harassing me for not wearing a hijab.

So no, I’m not wearing it with the weak belief of someone who thinks that Satan will urinate in her hair if she doesn’t.


13 thoughts on “Hijab to me

  1. Very thoughtful and i love these lines of yours
    “There are so many versions of hijab out there and there is no mention of a specific type of clothing for women in the Ahadith or Quran so I respect everyone’s version of modesty.”
    Be it hijab alone or its other version like full sleeves shirt or shalwar instead of loose jeans and not to forget dupatta, most of the people judge the girl’s character with these accessories and those people, sadly, include blood relatives and sometimes even parents count in the group.
    I don’t do hijab and I only hid my head during university hours, due to its environment, while the rest of the time it’s just my dupatta and I am satisfy with my way of hijaab. Although few years back i used to think how could one do hijaab, i perceived it tough however with time i learned to respect their reasons to embrace hijaab.
    No offense, the point is that i belief that not everyone is capable to do hijaab, it requires will power most of the time bestowed by Allah only because hijab is a promise to Allah that should only be made if one hold power to keep it, and at times admiration from other’s experiences with hijaab like the our childhood days that spend observing the monthly practice and dedication of our parents which led us started pretending to offer fast to the time day we actually fast with full intention and still do, at that time we were far away to understand what roza actually is but it’s importance comes with time.
    It’s unfair with the innocent kids shouldn’t be force into this. Teachers and parents as mentors can advice for its use. Moreover, they hold responsibility to first set example in front of kids that how they had welcome hijaab happily in their life and respect it.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. You are so right. And I agree with the fact that when we are kids, we are only imitating out of respect of our parents. You gave such a nice comment, thanks 🙂 I should have included this in my article. What disturbed me was that whenever I imitated my adults and asked them for THEIR reason on wearing a hijab, they never gave a satisfactory response. That’s where my curiosity was sparked. But I reached this conclusion that one shouldn’t do it out of fear of poeple but love of Allah.

      Liked by 2 people

  2. I like the way you see it 🙂 Masha Allah. May Allah keep you on the right path sister 🙂

    Btw you mentioned looking ugly. I must say that hijab is the most beautiful thing I find on a girl. Not that I should be staring or even looking at girls but whatever :3 it is what it is.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for commenting, Shoaib. Aameen 🙂 You’re right, it doesn’t make one look ugly… but when one starts wearing it and concealing the hair, one gets this feeling that maybe I don’t look as good as I used to. I really appreciate your encouragement! Thanks

      Liked by 2 people

      1. You’re welcome 🙂

        Yeah that’s why a lot of girls take it off in different functions and gatherings like you mentioned.

        As far as I’m concerned if my future wife turns out to be a hijabi then i’ll even ask her to wear it in front of me 😀 Lol

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Where did I do that? :p Oh the ‘if’ ? Good one sister! You’re good at noticing little things. I’ll not pressurize her into wearing hijab if she doesn’t want to. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

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